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The darkness inside of me is still very present. She’s still in there. But I almost want to silence her. She makes me think too much, she makes me want to be that girl that I truly am. But I don’t want to be her. I want to be the robot that I’ve been lately, I want to feel nothing. Feeling nothing is so much better than feeling everything that I feel. My heart is heavy, my mind is chaos. 

I have never needed a change more in my entire life than I do now. I need a new life. A completely new direction. 


(Source: jackandlillylover)

(Source: humanemoji)

Pills with million side effects
Take em when the pains felt
Wash them down with Diet soda!
Killin off your brain cells

It’s so loud inside my head with words I should have said.

As I drown in my regrets, I can’t take back the words I never said.

It’s all so bittersweet. 


This is an old pic I took of one of my friends. We went to the sea, and she told me her boyfriend broke her heart that day. And oh god oh god she was so sad. She took off all of her clothes and jumped in the water without saying a word. I watched her swimming so far and then coming back. When she walked out she sat near the water and I took this picture of her. I’ll never forget her.

Happy Birthday to my…extremely…”attractive” friend @samongram 😎💋🎈

Anonymous said: That's pretty funny, we have the same schedule. I'm also so much more productive at night so I end up working all night. Do you prefer the night? I think like right now will 8am is the best time of the day by far. It's so quiet and peaceful outside.

I prefer the night! I like right between 4 and 5 when the sun is rising

Anonymous said: So are you always tired? That really sucks when if you are. I have a couple hours then I'm wide awake! How come you can't sleep?

I will sometimes sleep in the late morning for three or four hours. But it usually very restless sleep. And I don’t sleep because for one I’m on a medication that keeps me up and for two I become more productive at night because I’m so drained during the day!

Anonymous said: At least you went to sleep. I slept for an hour and now I'm wide awake.

Oh I have yet to sleep… I was using “woke up” more as a metaphor. I never sleep anymore >_